Week 7 November 30th & December 1st
Tuesday November 30th
Highlight's by Debbi 'Lehigh is going to get smoked by Delaware Saturday' Lutes.jpg)
Pitch N Run 5 vs. Arrr 9
Pitch N Run had their pitches smacked by Arrrr!! In several games, they snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. In one game, Julie Smack had her hands full of balls after catching two in a row. Heather Nichols was simply en fuego. She was running, dodging and throwing like a pro. Scott Russell was a human highlight reel and was last man standing in the lone guys win. For Arrr, Captain Jeff White caught everything that came his way and was an all around all-star. Christine Warner was an animal on the court. She was on point all night with solid low throw to eliminate her opponents.
Saved by the Balls 3 vs. Shenanigans 11
Things weren’t lookin’ so good for Saved by the Balls as the proceeded to drop their first four games. The SBTB girls usually hang onto balls when they come their way, but not tonight. For some reason, they just couldn’t hold onto balls. Eric Bland had an unusual night too. On several occasions, he didn’t get to touch a single ball. This left him very disappointed. For Shenanigans, it was Christy Ganderton all night long. She was single handedly-responsible for three Shenanigan victories. For the men, Kenny Milewski and Bob Wassam proved to be very tough outs. Both came back from being down four on one to earn a victory.
Sofa Kings 6 vs. Balls in Yo Face 8
For Sofa Kings, it was definitely all about the ladies who carried the team! They played unbelievable and won most of their games, which is pretty impressive if I do say so myself. Serene Hunter was just plain amazing in her mismatched tie-dye socks and used a relentless technique where she stared straight ahead and made fast paced catches without flinching or looking at the ball. Avie Blau clearly brought her A game as well. For Balls in Yo Face, the guys started out strong by taking three of their first four games. Brian Eiseman and Jeff Hoban had some strong throws but the Sofa King men were their own worst enemy as they fell victim to being rookies on the bigger gym court and fell victim to stepping out of bounds. When not being called out for going out of bounds, Anthony Cantrell played a standout game and made some pretty nasty catches and throws.
Team Awesome 7 vs. Business Time 7
Business Time may be small in number, but they are one scrappy team!! Captain Alan Emerson led by example and played hard and with lots of heart. Todd Huber came up huge. And enough can’t be said about Rob ‘Don’t Call me Bob’ Cotter. He is stealth-like on the court – the opposing team can’t detect him. For the Team Awesome squad, Pete Abessinio He was catching everything that came in his direction. Lauren Barksy throws so hard that she should be forced to play with the guys. She and Megan Carpenter are a great duo and just plain fun to watch play. Despite some Top 10 Worthy plays, this one ended in a draw.
Incrediballz 2 vs. Salopes 12
For The Salopes, Ryan Cowles was a machine. He was making catches while holding onto other balls proving he is a master at controlling his balls. For their ladies, Marie Azzanesi and Danielle Mause were the dynamic duo. In an epic one-on-one battle with Laura Webbert, Danielle pulled out a victory for The Salopes. For The Incrediballz, nobody catches Frank Mayer’s balls. Well, except for maybe Eric McBride. He has good hands when balls are coming at him. Then there was Jackie Purcell. She played an awesome game with speedy dodges showing she is a force to be reckoned with.
Smart Alecks 9 vs. Sucka Ma Balls 5
This was an exciting match up and both teams played hard. Sucka Ma Balls put up a tough fight and played with everything they had. Bob Smagala stepped it up and dodged everything left and right with sheer poise while doing so. Kathleen Servis had a series of outstanding throws that seemed catchable at first, but caused her opponents to narrowly miss the balls and get out. For Smart Alecks, the guys played well together and were tuned in to everything that was happening on the court. For the ladies, Maura Schultz played like a champ and single handedly took down three opponents for a game win. Maria Sawczuk and Linda Richenderfer earn honorable mention for their amazing dodging skills.
More Tuesday Highlight's by:
Tim "it's hard work making this look easy" Connor .jpg?width=130&height=97)
AVERAGE JOE’S 6 vs. SHENANIGHANS IRISH PUB 8
The Average Joe’s had a reunion of sorts with their kickball team (Kickaholics) at Rooney’s before the game. Kickaholic superstar Ruby came out for pregame fun. It was a blast! So much so, they are planning more “Ruby Tuesday’s”! That’s what DSL is all about! Tim “the human highlight reel” Connor dropped the ball in more ways than one. Not only did he get thrown out consistently, he read the score sheet wrong and told the Joe’s that they won 8-6. Maybe teammate Amy Quan can arrange an eye exam for him? The Joe’s had a full roster of girls for maybe the second time this season. The blonde bombers (Maggie and Stephanie) kept Lindsey Ostafy and Kristi Kerrigan ducking for cover and the Amy’s (Taylor and Quan) were throwing bullets, but it usually came down to Cathy “the royal dodger” Paxon being the last girl on the court. She was facing 3 and 4 girls from the Pub most of the time and did the 5 D’s like a pro, but with all those balls coming at you, one of them is bound to hit you. Dan Matera has been the star for the Joe’s the past few weeks, but even his ball skills couldn’t match those of Malcolm Brotman and Kevin Molloy. The luck of the Irish was with Shenanighans in this hard fought match on Tuesday.
THAT CHEESE TEAM 7 vs. THE INCREDIBALLS 7
In what was clearly a statement game, “That Cheese Team” reminded “The Incrediballs” that it won’t be easy. That Cheese Team, led by Sonny Maiorano and Brian Levine, weren’t the least bit intimidated by the 68-12 record of the Incrediballs. They put a bullseye on Clarke Kania and made sure they got rid of him first. Rob Sparks picked up the slack for the Incrediballs as he added another letter to the 5 D’s. That would be an “F” for focused. He was definitely in the zone with laser like throws and acrobatic dodges. For the Cheese girls, Shauna Vogl had a one on two matchup with Morgan Herlihy and Valerie Phipps. She caught the ball Morgan threw and then threw out Valerie! I think we may have seen a preview of the finals here! So does Incrediballs captain Joe Kania, as he has scheduled 4 hours to review the film of this game.
SLINGIN SMACK ROCKS 9 vs. PITCH N RUN 5
In another hard fought match, Slingin Smack Rocks prevailed over Pitch N Run. The Slingers came out of the gate on fire, winning the first 4 matches. Samantha Culley was a force for the Slingers. She caught a ball that hit Megan Gainey in the shoulder for the save and then threw out Heather Nichols! Her 5 D’s were definitely on display! If there was a gold glove award for catching, Jeff Argus of Pitch N Run should get it. He made several one handed grabs and threw one ball at Steve Shupe so hard it knocked him down! But that wasn’t enough, the Slingers made the plays when it counted and held on for the win.
BUD LIGHT 9 vs. I’D HIT IT 5
I’d hit it got hit a few more time in this one. After a shaky start this year, Bud Light has been pouring it on lately. Gina Santa Barbara had the play of the night with a shoe string catch of Kristin Rogers throw and later in the match she threw out Amanda Powell with a rocket to the leg. For the I’d hit it guys, Nick Proctor and Ed Kostas ganged up on John Leyh. He was the last man on the court for Bud Light and Nick and Ed had him trapped in the corner. They threw at the same time and made sure it was the “high low combo”. John didn’t have a chance. Both balls hit him. This was one of many close games on Tuesday and I think the playoffs are going to have a few upsets!
16 TOP GUNZ 10 vs. GROW A PAIR 4
After getting shellacked by The Untouchaballs last week, 16 Top Gunz were ready to play tonight. Wendy Mushow and Terra Castelow were the 1-2 punch for the Gunz Girls. They had a play worked out where they both ran to the center line and then Wendy passed the ball to Terra. This caught Kristie Manley completely by surprise because she was still watching Wendy when Terra threw the ball at her. You could say she was “Terrarized”. Gunz guy David Guinan made sure Grow a Pair didn’t grow much of anything. He had the 5 D’s on display. Just ask Matt Lenza and Greg Bardin. They fell victim to his laser like throws in 3 of the games. The Gunz look like they’re loaded for the playoffs!
STSI 7 vs. BUTTERBALLS 7
STSI may be running out of gas at the wrong time! After getting a scare from the Average Joe’s last week, they tied with the Butterballs. Butterballers Steve Carle and Laura Colosi kept STSI on their toe’s in each match. Laura made a diving catch and then threw out Kimberlee Frerichs. That may have been the play of the day! Steve Carle of Butterballs and Steve Walker of STSI had a one on one, or you could call it a battle of the Steve’s, that lasted a good 5 minutes. There was dodging, diving, ducking and dodging until Steve got hit with the ball resulting in a win for Steve. There is a prize for whomever guesses which Steve was the winner (STSI and Butterballs are exempt from this). Butterballs look like they are gaining momentum for the playoffs!
Wednesday December 1st
These Wednesday Highlight's by:
Debbi 'Lehigh is going to get smoked by Delaware Saturday' Lutes
Blue Balls 9 vs. Short Bus Squad 5
Blue Baller Steve Casini played an outstanding game! He single handedly took down his opponents, including four in one game! Brett Turner took the art of diving for catches to an entirely new level after he slid across the majority of the width of the court. Sam DelPizzio is finally free of her boot and hasn’t lost a step! For The Short Bus Squad, Melissa Russell used a softball pitch-like throw, which was very effective, and soon other teammates followed her lead. For the men, James Omerod and Thomas Payne played remarkable games and ducked, dodged and threw like there was no tomorrow.
Five Ohh 7 vs. CR Hooligans 7
This match-up was all about the men of CR Hooligans and the ladies of Five Ohh. For Five Ohh, it was Katie Jacobs and Jessica Cancila who had some fine catches and amazing throws to help propel the ladies past Hooligan’s. They really brought the heat tonight! On the men’s side, it was Matt Kucharski and Scott Mance for Hooligans. Mr. Mance might have shown up late, but he made up for it with a shoestring catch to finish a game. Matt added some diving catches and stellar dodging.
Out of Bounds 10 vs. Scratch Attack 4
Despite being without hard-thrower John Ellis, Out of Bounds came ready to play. Well, all but Taylor Haverkamp. He proved to be more productive to his team when standing on the sidelines deflecting balls back in play then when he was actually on the court. You are not going to earn MVP honors if you can’t stay in the game for more than 4 seconds. The ladies had Courtney Kendall. She was the lone Out lady at the end of almost every game and fired shot after shot to bring home a couple of W’s. For Scratch Attack, Amy Richetti may be little, but she came up BIG. She proved it’s not how big you are, it’s how big you play. She, Erica Thomas and Stephanie Bennett were a triple threat.
Bloodbath and Beyond 11 vs. Chaos Under New Terms 3
Blood Bath and Beyond seemed to have no problem taking care of Chaos Under New Terms. Maureen Heimerman played great for Bloodbath last night, using her strength to knock out the Chaos girls like pins in a bowling alley. All I can say is strike. Andrew Davis had a great game as well. He was a real Tarzan on the court. He was snatching the ball and heaving it through the air like a true man of the jungle. Chaos Under New Terms couldn’t put it together last night, but John Madison showed real flexibility and versatility. He was moving from side to side across the court and looking one way while throwing the other. He is one to look out for. Bonnie Wilson was representing for girls, bobbing and weaving and dodging, trying to keep her team alive.
The rest of the Wednesday Highlights by
Tim "it's hard work making this look easy" Connor
BALL BUSTERZ 4 vs. HIT IT N QUIT IT 10
Hit It n Quit It was determined to end the regular season with a victory. Well, they definitely accomplished that on Wednesday. “Mean” Joe Greene (just kidding about the mean part Joe) had Felix Miranda and Dave Marshall so scared of him, they ran out of bounds to avoid getting hit! Ball Busterz Adrianne Franzosa and Heather Corrado thought they had Angela Maida trapped. They made sure they both threw at the same time, figuring that at least one of them would hit her. But Angela had other ideas. She “maida” spectacular catch and then threw out Heather. I wouldn’t take any of these teams lightly in the playoffs next week. As a matter of fact, I predict Ball Busterz will be the Cinderella team in the playoffs.
The real highlights from Wednesday however had to be the amazing display of talent and grace displayed by Sarah and Lindsey Edmiston. This is a sister duo that we have not seen the likes of since the Venus and Serena. Together on the court they are unstoppable and with friend and cohort Lauren Morris at their side it’s like the Justice League of America out there against the rest of DSL.
– A little side note from Bobby D.
BSD 8 vs. DAISES AND BUTTERFLIES 6
Daisies and Butterflies managed to win 6 games tonight with their uncanny ability to dodge so quickly it seemed like they weren’t even there! Not to worry, Bill Jeppe and Jaime August of BSD were able to pick the Daisies off with lightning fast throws. BSD is peaking right in time for the playoffs!
THE ARTFUL DODGERS 9 vs. HIT IT N BOUNCE 5
Both teams had their game faces on tonight! Paul Mathews and Melanie Adams artfully dodged balls all night while Katie Burke and Scott Mathews threw bullets to lead the Artful Dodgers to victory. But Hit It n Bounce weren’t going quietly. Amanda Moses grabbed balls that went out of bounds and passed them top Larry Pusey and David Koston. They used the element of surprise to peg Dodgers and keep each game close. But in the end, the Dodgers held on for the “W”. If these two teams play like this next week, they will definitely make some noise in the playoffs.
SMASHING TIME 4 vs. ABUSEMENT PARK 9
Smashing time took a trip to the Abusement Park and guess what? That’s right, they got abused. The Smashing Time girls got knocked out so quick, they didn’t even break a sweat. They saved their energy for the games after the games! The guys didn’t fare much better. Captain Paul Puszkarczuk tried motivating Evan Littman to get the ball on the face off by telling him there was a slice of pizza under it. He ran to the center line like an Olympic sprinter and grabbed the ball out of Neil McCall’s hand. Then he took a bite out of it! Needless to say, he was really disappointed. The Abusement Park is definitely open for business in the playoffs!
Week 6.5 November 23rd
Highlight's by
Debbi Lots of Turkey on Thursday but still went to the gym Lutes
Salopes 6 vs. Balls in Yo Face 8
Balls in Yo Face were able to keep Salopes at ay with the help of Stacy Fahey, who had an amazing dive on the floor to dodge and catch at the same time. Karl Smith definitely helped keep the Ballers on track with his quick feet, but Brian Eiseman was definitely the MVP of the night. There is no real reason behind this honor; I just wanted to give him a shout out!! Xavier Berthelot was definitely a hard one to hit for the Salopes and Diana DeBenedictis had a great catch while falling to the ground! She was a work horse for the Salopes. Despite their gritty performance, Balls in Yo Face squeaked by them.
Team Awesome 7 vs. Smart Alecks 7
What a game this was! There was more damage done to Kalai King’s shorts then the Spectrum. He managed to split the seat of his shorts and had to borrow a pair of pants to finish the match! Barry Martin showed an amazing effort for Team Awesome. You should have seen the speed at which he hurled balls at his opponents! He was totally working it on the court. Lauren Barsky was representing for the girls, shooting balls like seeds from a watermelon. But the real prize goes to Smart Alecks for coming back to win four consecutive games to end the match up in a draw. Jen Johnson was a breath of fresh air, taking on her opponents with grace and composure. Peter Scherer was Rubberman, working it like Gumby riding his trusty stead Pokey through a mine of cacti.
Pitch N Run 9 vs. Arrrr 5
Arrr put up a good fight. Courtney Nice really held her own against three opponents in what had to be almost record time anyone has ever lasted on the court by themselves. Dan Sutton played a fantastic game both offensively and defensively; he is really one with the ball. Connor O’Malley almost had a game win after he caught a ball literally seconds after he was hit by one to get out. For Pitch N Run, the guys used some strategizing and team work to go for the win. They threw simultaneously when they could. And when they couldn’t, they threw in rapid succession. Scott Russell made the final game winning catch moments after he did a graceful sideways somersault.
Pitch N Run 8 vs. Slingin Smack Rocks 6
Fresh off a successful battle with Arrr, Pitch N Run came into the second match up of their twin billing firing on all cylinders. Katrina Tavares led the defensive side of the game for Pitch N Run. Her catching was nothing short of amazing! Scott Russell brought the offense with some killer throwing. Craig Koch used his strong arm to help Slingin’ Smack Rocks even with Pitch N Run. Despite some astonishing catches by Sam Culley and Megan Gainey, Slingin’ Smack Rocks came up a bit short.
Bud Light 7 vs. Saved By The Balls 7
Both teams clearly brought their A games tonight. It was like a battlefield out there with balls flying all over the place. For Bud Light, Gina Santa Barbara played an outstanding game and remained the last one n the court on more than one occasion thanks to her remarkable dodges. John Leyh was back in action after missing last week’s game and he caught everything that came his way. For Saved By The Balls, Josh Einhorn played like a champ and single handedly took down three opponents for a game win while teammate Annette Kane showed more energy than the Energizer Bunny.
Out of Bounds 11 vs. Five Ohh 3
Out of Bounds Captain Brian Poole ended up alone on the court more than once. One of those times, he was down 4 on 1 and managed to mow his opponents down one by one to bring it to an even 1 on 1. He pulled out an exciting win for the Out of Bounds crew with an amazing one handed catch! Five Ohh’s Dan Vignola also came back from a huge deficit against three Out of Bounds men. The ladies of Five Ohh had a great showing. Katie Jacobs and Dana Steinbrunner each made shoestring catches to bring back fellow Five Ohhers while Kim Sedgwick was spot on with her throwing accuracy.
Highlight's By Tim I get better everyone week Connor!
AVERAGE JOE’S 5 vs. BTSI 9
Let’s have a round of applause for the Joe’s girls! There were only 3 of them but they played like there were five! Maggie Fauver, Amy Taylor, and Stephanie Shamrock played some of the hardest fought matches of the year but were only able to get one win. They played their hearts out but something happened that usually doesn’t happen with these three. They couldn’t hold onto the balls! Maybe if Amy and Cathy were able to attend the results would be different. I’ve yet to see those two lose their grip on balls! For the Joe’s guys, Tim “the human highlight reel” Connor wasn’t exactly a human highlight reel as he did his best Jason Avant imitation by dropping a ball that hit him right in the numbers. After Dan Matera had his “best weekend ever” he had his “best dodge ball game ever”. He was the last man standing in 3 of the 4 Joe’s guys wins. Don’t worry Dan, I won’t mention the message you left on Amy’s voicemail! For “Smarter than Sexual Innuendo”, Alaina Jacobi and David Yeager threw “round objects” that hit the other teams “body parts”. They did not squeeze the “round objects” or hold them too long and the result was a win. Was that smarter than sexual innuendo?
GROW A PAIR 4 vs. THAT CHEESE TEAM 10
“That Cheese Team” smelled like a rose this week. The “grow a pair” girls looked like Swiss cheese after all the bullet like throws from Amy Zak. As a matter of fact, she threw a ball so hard at Lynn Kelly, I thought it went thru her! Grow a pair’s Adam Salup made 4 amazing catches and had a mono a mono duel with Brent Rohm. He did the old “throw one ball in the air to distract your opponent” trick which fooled Brent. He took a shot right in the breadbasket. Hopefully that won’t affect his appetite for Thursday!
BUTTERBALLS 7 vs. SHENANIGHANS IRISH PUB 7
What a match! The Butterballs got their balls buttered last week by the Smart Alecks and decided they needed to work on their strategy. Emily Leach and Jill Jackson practiced throwing for 3 hours and 14 minutes on Monday. It was exactly enough time as they simultaneously threw balls at Abby Robinson in each game. I guess she isn’t used to two balls coming at her at once because she got thrown out each time! For Shenanighans, Paul Hilbig came up big all night. He was the last man standing in the last 3 wins for the Shenanighans guys to ensure the 7-7 tie. Shenanighans Irish Pub plays the Average Joe’s next week. My advice to them would be to practice. I heard a rumor that the Joe’s have something up their sleeve!
THE UNTOUCHABALLS 13 vs. 16 TOP GUNZ 1
After getting a scare last week (and by scare I mean they only won by 2 games) “The Untouchaballs” are back on track. Clarke Kania didn’t get dressed in the dark this week but he certainly turned the lights out on the Gunz! In two games, he knocked out 3 of the Gunz. Rob Sparks and Valerie Phipps made several shoestring catches in another dominating performance by “The Untouchaballs”. Captain Joe Kania has instilled his own killer instincts in this group with his motivational pre-game speeches. He learned this from his constant watching of dodge ball coaching DVD’s. He spends so much time preparing for each game he has no time to go out! Well, that might not be true but he certainly has a great team this season.
BSD 8 vs. SHENANIGHANS 6
Shenanighans knew they had their work cut out for them with BSD. They had a tough loss to Bud Light last week but they were prepared to do battle tonight! Christy Ganderton and Ronnie Cheadle kept Shenanighans focused, even when balls were flying at them from all directions. But it wasn’t enough. BSD showed the heart of a champion and giving that little bit extra. Ryan Ball and Aleesa Zeccola acted like Tom Brady in a two minute drill. When it seemed like time was running out, they stayed calm and made sure there were no “Shenanighans” happening tonight!
SUCKA MA BALLS 6 vs. BUSINESS TIME 8
In a game with playoff implications, Business Time held on for a hard fought victory. Almost every game went down to the wire. Autumn Mauk and Dawn Scerni were the 1-2 punch for Business Time. They took teamwork to another level tonight as they singled out Kelly Sheehan in one game and threw two balls at her at once! One hit her and the other hit Janine Scherr. I think that may have been the first unintentional double play in DSL history! Jason Coombs made the difference in the 3rd guys game with a catch and throw that took out Eric Zupan with the catch and Drew Deionno with the throw. Something tells me these two teams will meet again in the post season.
Week 6 November 16th & 17th
Thanks for yet another great week! It has been a great season so far and we are getting ready to come into the home stretch of the Fall Season and then we have a little break for the Holiday's then back into it in January for the Wilmington 2011 Winter Dodgeball Season! Here is the "action" from this week's games thanks to Tim & Debbi...oh and WELCOME BACK DEBBI!
Tuesday November 16th
Highlight's by Debbi "Lemme Have a UD Win This Week" Lutes!
BSD 10 vs. Scratch Attack 4
The ladies of BSD are led by Dana McCloskey. She is just plain good. She and Erin Calloway were an awesome 1-2 punch as they received sideline tips from Captain Michael Brady. Mike not only coached from the sidelines, he showed up ready to play and announced his presence on the court with authority. For Scratch Attack, Matt Quinn displayed some gumby-like moves to avoid being hit. The play of the game goes to Alicia Yingst. In a one-on-one match up with Dana, she dodged a barrage of incoming rocket like throws to make an outstanding catch to earn a W for Scratch Attack.
Slingin’ Smack Rocks 7 vs. Arrrrr 7
This one went back and forth all night. For Slingin’ Smack Rocks, it was a total team effort. Everyone stepped their game up a notch. Phenomenal catching by Sam Culley, John Rizzo, Brian Thomas and Ashleigh Marlar and strong, accurate throws by Craig Koch and Steve Shupe led to wins. Arrrr played just as well. Courtney Nice, Diane Hamilton and Jeff Dassel were catching machines. Captain Jeff White was firing cross court shots to knock off his opponents.
Business Time 6 vs. Shenanighans Irish Pub 8
This was a tight match that came down to the final two games. Business Time had it going on early on. Todd Huber was like a Dyson and sucking up every ball that was in his general vicinity and Jillian Volk displayed some matrix-like moves to avoid being hit. The difference for the Irish Pub ladies was Abby Robinson. She was a dominant presence on the court as she was left on the court by herself in three different games. Jennifer Manson added some good catches while Kristi Kerrigan had the Business Time ladies dancing all over the court.
Chaos Under New Terms 13 vs. The Artful Dodgers 1
What can be said really, other than the fact that Chaos Under New Terms is a tough team to beat! The Chaos men have rapid repeating throws which proved to be a little difficult for The Artful Dodgers. John Madison put so much power behind his throws; there may be some dents in the wall of the Y gym. Although Chaos is a tough team, The Artful Dodgers played with everything they had and never gave up. Ryan Mahoney was left the last man standing numerous times and put forth amazing effort and Melanie Adams was quick on her feet and did her best to dodge everything that came her way.
The Untouchables 8 vs. Sofa Kings 6
Sofa Kings came into this one very determined knowing they were facing the toughest team in the division. In the first ladies game, it was all Avie Blau. She single handedly earned the win. JC Hughes, Pat Burris and Gabbie West both made phenomenal, well timed catches to help earn wins. Eric Anderson made the best throws of the night that didn’t count as he fell victim to crossing the center line. The Untouchables proved why they are leading the division. Jen Coursey and Rachel Handy led the ladies with their powerful throws and shoestring catches. The player of the night was Clarke Kania. His interesting choice of attire just may land him a leading roll in What Not To Wear – DSL Dodgeball Addition.
Sucka Ma Balls 5 vs. STSI 9
STSI managed to cut down Sucka Ma Balls. Kim Frerichs was dodging those balls left and right and even resorted to rolling around on the gym floor to avoid being hit. AJ Roop was extra hardcore drilling his opponents by whipping balls with fierce speed and pinpoint accuracy across the court. But Sucka Ma Balls definitely gave it their all and were led by Kelly Sheehan. She was the last lady standing on several occasions and she represented for not only the ladies, but her whole team. That girt has real heart! Teammate Stacey Curtis left the match up bewildered as she was hit by balls on three different occasions. At Hooligans, she announced that she usually doesn’t get hit by balls.
These Highlight's by Tim "the wizard of words" Connor
AVERAGE JOE’S 5 vs. TEAM AWESOME 9
The Joe’s were out to prove that bigger isn’t better. They came up a little short. After winning an all time high 7 games on the “big” court on Walnut St, they couldn’t quite match last week’s performance on a “small” court at Highlands. To which, the Joe’s ladies said an emphatic “told you so, bigger IS better”. But hey, it’s not the size of the court its’ how you throw your balls! Amy Quan made a guest appearance on the court and was a ball of energy, dodging, jumping, laughing, giggling and throwing out opponents in each game. Tim “the human highlight reel” Connor, Stephanie “Lucky Charm” Shamrock, and Maggie “I’ll have another” Fauver decided to conduct an experiment before the game at Hooligan’s. How many beers and lemon drops can you have and still play? The answer – NONE. For Team Awesome, it was the Jessie Kraszewski show. The Joe’s girls definitely headed for the hills when she had the ball! One of her throws was so hard it hit all 5 of the Joe’s girl!! Team Awesome was definitely that tonight as they held off the surging Joe’s. Hey Kalai, was that really hair gel?
BUD LIGHT 9 vs. SHENANIGANS 5
Bud Light is off the schnide! After getting thumped the last couple of weeks, they had enough. Mike LaShomb was throwing the dreaded “LaShomb bomb” and Hannah Messner wasn’t messing around as they had Shenanigans on their heels most of the night. The Bud Light sales rep called Bobby D to renew their sponsorship based on tonight’s game! But Shenanigans wasn’t going quietly. Brittany McDuell had two one on one duels that she won and most games went down to the wire. Maybe Bud Light will keep their momentum going against Saved by the Balls next week?
16 TOP GUNZ 11 vs. SALOPES 3
Maybe the Salopes were still recovering from their hard fought 7-7 tie with That Cheese Team or the Gunz are just that good? I don’t know! But what I do know is Christine Anderson and David Guinan showed no mercy as they mowed down Salope after Salope and it ain’t no joke! Their rocket like throws were right on target and had the Salopes dizzy all night! They couldn’t wait to get out of there and get to Hooligan’s. At least Michelle Corder won a $5 at the games after the games.
GROW A PAIR 12 vs. INCREDIBALLZ 2
Grow a Pair’s win total has been growing every week! They really stuck it to Incrediballz with a 12 – 2 spanking on Tuesday. Incrediballz may have still been recovering from the 13 – 1 shellacking they got from The Untouchaballs last week but Grow a Pair was showing no sympathy. Seems there was a pair of Supinski’s (Hank and Thresa) who made quick work of the Incrediballz. The constant barrage of balls had the Incrediballz a little shell shocked by the end of the game. So much so that Laura Webbert was doing the 5 d’s in the parking lot after the game! Hang in there Incrediballz!
BUTTER BALLS 3 vs. SMART ALECKS 11
Smart Alecks got a wakeup call last week with a 7-7 tie with the Average Joe’s. Captain Pete Scherer decided to have a practice during the week to ensure that didn’t happen again. They practiced the “high low throw” and used it to perfection! The Butterballs never knew what hit them! Jill Jackson got hit so many times she actually spun around! Butter Balls has Shenanigans Irish Pub next week, maybe a practice is in order? Anyway, both teams laughed it up after the game and that’s what this is all about.
Wednesday November 17th
Highlight's by Debbi "Lemme Have a UD Win This Week" Lutes!
Out of Bounds 12 vs. I’d Hit It 2
You cannot mention Out of Bounds without thinking of Taylor Haverkamp. He might be one of the best umpires in the league, but he has hands like a snake on the dodgeball court. Good thing for him and Out of Bounds, Brian Poole and Mark Wagner were there to bail him out. Their ladies are led by the dynamic duo of Courtney Kendall and Eli Malan. They were firing rockets at their opponents. I’d Hit It gave it their best shot. Captain Mike Clendaniel showed his missile of an arm which matches the strength of his kickball leg while Greg Scarpa took whatever means necessary to avoid being hit. Despite a hard fought game, I’d Hit It came up short.
Saved By The Balls 10 vs. CR Hooligans 4
The showdown of some of the hardest throwers in the league.Well, everyone except for Jeff Hoban. Saved By The Balls Captain Donna Deldeo gutted out a tough 3-on-1 match up to warn a win. Eric Bland wasn’t too proud to show off his cannon, both on and off the court. Scott Mance came up big for the Hooligans men. He looked like Pat Devlin out there making pinpoint accurate throws. Chris Martinez played hard, just like he has done all season. Hooligans played hard but the explosive throws from SBTB proved to be too much.
Balls in Yo Face 8 vs. That Cheese Team 6
A combined team effort and a desire to be victorious helped Balls in Yo Face squeak by That Cheese Team. Standout players included Stacy Fahey, Jess Casale and Rob Fleck who each held their own for their solo match wins. Eric Spencer was dodging multiple balls coming his way. That Cheese Team battled hard and had some playmakers as well. Team Glazed Donut – Mark Wohner and Sonny Maiorano – gutted it out for the Cheese men while Jenn Henry was the stand out for the Cheese ladies.
Hit It Then Bounce 6 vs. Bloodbath and Beyond 8
Theresa Dunham led the defensive side of the game for Bloodbath and Beyond. Her catching was nothing short of amazing! Tom Attenweiler brought the offense for the boy’s side with some killer throws. David Koston used his strong arm to help Hit It Then Bounce stay in the game. Larry Pusey’s and Elise Turner’s defensive catching was not able to secure the victory for Hit It Then Bounce, but it was a close one.
These Highlight's by Tim "the wizard of words" Connor
SHORT BUS SQUAD 11 vs. SMASHING TIME 3
Smashing Time captain Paul Pratuzchuksckiskiolowski was a game time decision as to whether he would play or not. Seems he almost sliced the tip of his finger off earlier in the week. Maybe he should have sat this one out because Eric Cranny and Thomas Irizarry of the Short Bus Squad noticed his injury and took advantage of it by throwing two balls at him at once. There’s a joke there, but I’m going to leave it alone. Let’s just say they both balls hit him at the same time. The Smashing Time girls, led by Kellyanne Long and Lauren Ward, put up a fight in their games but the Short Bus Squad was too much. I mean, when you have Kristen Jarrett throwing bullets at you all game, you know you’re in trouble. She threw one so hard it bounced off of Jim Marshall and landed in the pizza Evan Littman brought to the game!
ABUSEMENT PARK 5 vs. BLUE BALLS 9
Abusement Park had a hard fought victory last week but came up a little short this week. Coincidentally, the Blue Balls were actually throwing blue balls! There’s a joke here too but I’m not touching it! Frank Gwynn and Steve Casini sealed the deal by making sure their blue balls were thrown so hard they couldn’t be caught. For the Abusement Park, Emily Klein and Erica Basara ducked and dodged, but with so many blue balls coming at them they couldn’t dodge them forever! This was one of the toughest bouts of the week but the Blue Ballers had just a little more zip in their throws to pull out the “W”.
FIVE OHH 4 vs. DASIES AND BUTTERFLIES 10
Don’t let the gentle name fool you, Daisies and Butterflies are beasts! Last week, the crushed Bud Light and this week they put the hurt on Five Ohh. Captain Dan Vignola tried to rally Five Ohh by throwing out 3 of the D&B guys in one game but the Daisies and Butterflies were too much. Watch out BSD, you have Daisies and Butterflies next!
ARRR 9 vs. BALL BUSTERZ 5
This was another tough bout. But Dave Zeldin and Diane Hamilton for Arrr made sure they held on for the win with their dodging and throwing. Diane had a one on one match with Katrina Rothwell and threw the ball so hard it actually knocked Katrina over! Don’t worry, she was ok. Arrr was arrrrrguably the better team tonight but the Busterz were in every game. Jim Emory had a jumping catch and then threw a strike to take out Dan Sutton, but it was too little too late. Arrr was just a little better tonight!
Week 5 November 10th & 11th
I want to send an unbelievable thank you to Tim Connor who worked unbelievably hard even when we were unable to get the scores to him until late to come up with this fun and hilarious fiction for our highlights. Pete and I deal with the day to day stuff operations and business side of DSL. The umpires make sure that you have DSL representatives there to umpire your games and make sure the night goes as smoothly as possible.
Then there is the element of DSL that I like to think brings us to life and gives this DSL things soul. It is people like Tim who step and keep the heart of DSL beating and the spirit of what we are trying to do alive. DSL is about a community working together to create an awesome thing for one another. Your job as a member is to come out, have fun, be good to one another, go out after the games and get to know each other. Then take it out into the real world and keep that DSL spirit alive all the time.
Without people like Tim and Debbie a piece of that DSL life would be missing and when those of you go above and beyond to make this everything it can be...DSL just comes to life.
Thank you so much for your hard work this week Tim! Our beloved Debbi will be back next week for sure to help you out. Thanks for such a great week!
Here are the Highlight's by Tim " I hope Debbie is back next week" Connor!
AVERAGE JOE’S 7 SMART ALECKS 7
Looks like the move to Walnut St is what the Joe’s needed. They more than doubled their win total for the entire season. The girls were short handed (as usual) but that did not matter. Cathy “the royal dodger” Paxon, ducked, dodged and dipped all night and only took one ball to the face. That didn’t seem to faze her at all! Amy Taylor had her game face on. I think getting lost trying to find the parking lot made her want to kick butt! For Stephanie Shamrock, it was a different Y but the results were almost the same. Instead of throwing a ball onto the track, she threw it into the backboard! For the Joe’s guys, Tim “the human highlight reel” Connor had his usual awesome game. He was the last Joe standing in 2 games and pulled out the “W” in both. John Luckini threw a ball so hard it knocked the glasses off of one of the Smart Alecks. Nick Rowe and Tom Carey each had great catches but Dan Matera was on fire. In 5 games, he either threw out the last Smart Aleck or made the last catch! For the Smart Alecks, Eddie Torres was jumping so high to avoid balls it looked like he was on a trampoline.
THE UNTOUCHABALLS 13 INCREDIBALLZ 1
So far, The Untouchaballs are 47-5. This has to be a DSL record. They may have already clinched first place! Captain Joe Kania certainly has a great group of players, especially his brother Clarke. For the 2nd time this year, he won a match when he was the only player against 4 opponents. Hey Joe, looks like he got the athletic gene! Jessica Harrison had 5 catches and Morgan Herlihy took out two incrediballz with one incredathrow! There does not seem to be a weak spot in this lineup! The Incrediballz tried hard, but the Untouchaballs seem to be untouchable!
STSI 5 TEAM AWESOME 9
Team Awesome had to reach into their bag of awesomeness and pull out some extra awesome to hold off STSI! It seemed like STSI wasn’t buying into the whole “awesome” thing. For the guys, Scott Brooks was not at all intimidated by Tropic Davis’s Fu Manchu. He definitely didn’t fear the Fu as he knocked Tropic out of two games! But Team Awesome would not quit. Jessica Kraszewski was focused on one thing and one thing only, catching the ball! She caught 3 balls in one game which was really awesome! STSI battled, but just Team Awesome proved to be awesome!
BUSINESS TIME 8 BUTTER BALLS 6
Business Time was riding high off of a thumping of the Average Joe’s last week, but they knew they would have a battle against the Butter Balls. Erin Marino and Jonathan Criswell took out so many Business Time players, I thought they actually put butter on the balls! But Business Time was determined to win! Jenna Lichtenwalner managed to take out three opponents and not brake a nail while Bradley Burr “burrried” the ball in his arms with some amazing catches. This was a back and forth match but Business Time prevailed with a 8-6 win.
SHENANIGANS IRISH PUB 10 SUCKA MA BALLS 4
I’m not sure if it was the luck of the Irish or Sucka Ma Balls not being prepared to play on a gym that is twice the size of what they are used to playing on. Many of the Sucka’s seemed winded as they ran to retrieve balls, which after a while, took a toll on them. I bet they were happy to get some liquid refreshment after the game! For Shenanigans, it was more skill than luck of the Irish. Erin McLaughlin and Kristi Kerrigan made amazing catches for the girls and Paul Hilbig and Brandon Mosley threw bullets for the guys. I bet the Sucka’s can’t wait to get back to the central Y!
ARRR 8 HIT IT N QUIT IT 6
Tuesday night at Walnut street was the night of close games. I think it is because of the size of the courts. At times, both teams seemed gassed as they ran what seemed to be a mile to get the balls and then all the way back to the wall. Both teams figured out that if the runner threw the balls back to people who were at the start line, they would have a better chance of winning. For ARRR, Elise Attardo was able to consistently catch balls and that was the difference as they prevailed in a hard fought match.
PITCH N RUN 6 ARRR 8
ARRR learned how to use the size of the court to their advantage in their second game of the evening. They hung back and made Pitch N Run throw balls a long distance to try and get them out. But they were tired from their first match of the night. Jared Taylor and Johanna Kung of Pitch n Run were able to pick off quite a few members of ARRR, but ARRR’s experience in the first game was the difference. They were able to hang on in a very hard fought match and swept their double header!
TUESDAY Night HIGHLANDS
BSD 7 OUT OF BOUNDS 7
It was back and forth for two very evenly matched teams in this match. BSD was led by Rob Borkowski and Kelly Calloway who threw and caught like they were born to play dodge ball. Kelly even made a catch with her eyes closed, which gave the BSD girls the victory which tied the match. Way to go! It was such a good game that even Taylor didn’t argue any calls! Maybe he was sick?
BUD LIGHT 2 DAISIES AND BUTTERFLIES 12
Not only did Bud Light get served at the Del Rose Café afterwards, they got served on the court too! But don’t worry, they are not dropping their sponsorship. Honestly, I don’t think any team could of stood up to the onslaught from D & B. In this game, they should have been called Linebackers and Godzilla.
BALLS IN YO FACE 7 GROW A PAIR 7
Grow a pair grew a pair! Matt Lenza and Andy Auger played like a pair of …… a pair of ….. a pair of …. A pair of very skilled dodge ball players. Yeah, that’s what they were! They did the old “high low throw” to take out Rob Fleck to give them the victory for the tie in the match. Balls in yo face played well, but they met an equally skilled team on Tuesday!
16 TOP GUNZ 9 SOFA KINGS 5
We found out one thing. Sofa Kings are nothing without Debbie Lutes. I’m sure she would rather have been in Wilmington on Tuesday instead of Miami. I mean, it was 52 degrees here! As Chris Connelly put it, they got beat by the 16 top gunz womens firing squad. Jeanna Labik and Melissa Hall took out the Sofa King ladies like ducks on a pond. I’m glad Debbie was spared from the firing squad because we definitely need her highlight skills!
SAVED BY THE BALLS 6 FIVE OH 8
In another close match, Five Oh beat Saved by the Balls. The SBTB girls, led by Donna Deldeo and Jessica Travis, caught, threw, dived, dodged and dipped but it wasn’t enough. Five Oh was able to get Eight wins with the help of a few amazing catches by Kim Sedgwick and Dan Vignola. They were cool calm and collected and nobody was saved by the balls when they threw!
WEDNESDAY
ARTFUL DODGERS 6 ABUSEMENT PARK 8
The artful dodgers took a trip to the abusement park this week and came up just short. Aaron Grossman and Erica Basara made sure that Ryan Mahoney and Marisa Stumpo paid the price for admission as they threw them out in each game! This was another one of the 10 or 11 really close games this week that could have gone either way. But the end, The Abusement Park was open for business as they held on for the win.
SMASHING TIME 2 HIT IT THEN BOUNCE 12
I guess Smashing Time didn’t take my advice from last week and stayed away from the pre game “Paultinis”. Or maybe captain Paul Pratuzchuksckiskiolowski played a little too much call of duty before the game? I don’t think even the special forces would have helped here. Elise Turner and David Koston made sure they hit it and bounced out to the sponsoring bar in record time!
BLUE BALLS 11 BLOOD BATH AND BEYOND 3
It certainly was a bloodbath …. AND beyond. Not only were the Blue Ballers catching everything, they had Megan Dempsey was throwing rockets at BB & B. She was so in the zone, it was as if she became one with the ball! I think between seasons, she should give dodge ball lessons. She effortlessly mowed down the BB & B girls like it was a shooting gallery. Let’s see if she can repeat this next week when she takes a trip to the abusement park!
CHAOS UNDER NEW TERMS 6 SHORT BUS SQUAD 8
There was no chaos tonight as the Short Bus Squad pulled out the victory. Thomas Payne once again brought the pain and Krystle Benedetto controlled Chaos with their cat like reflexes and rocket arms. They were able to put out a late rally by Chaos to allow them to hang on for the “W”.
SHENANIGHANS 10 HOOLIGANZ 4
If only Scott Mance could transfer his epic bowling skills to dodge ball, this might have been closer. Maybe he thought it was bowling because he was rolling the ball instead of throwing it? Anyway, Brittany McDowell and Bob Wassam of Shenanighans were not playin’ as they lit up the Hooliganz with their throwing and catching skills. Way to go!
SCRATCH ATTACK 12 I’D HIT IT 2
For Scratch Attack, Andrew Hammerer “hammerered” the opponent so much in this game, They thought about changing the team name to “Hammerer Attack”. And by the way, “I’d Hit it” wanted to change their name to “Please don’t hit us anymore”. I’d hit it was very glad when this was over so they could drink some Bud light with the scratchers. Andrew felt kinda bad about the game that he even got a round for them! Now that’s what DSL is about!
SLINGING SMACK ROCKS 13 BALL BUSTERZ 1
Ball Busters certainly got their balls busted again tonight! The Slingin Smack Rocks smack showed no mercy as they put the hurt on the Ball Busterz. For The Rocks girls, Samantha Culley had the 5 D’s down to perfection. She even took out 2 Ball Busterz with ball! How often do you see that! Steve Shupe contributed with a spectacular diving catch and then jumped up to throw out a Slinger. Way to go Steve! Hang in there Ball Busterz, there is still time left in the season to get some wins!
THAT CHEESE TEAM 7 THE SALOPES 7
This was the hardest fought match of the night. Each game went down to the wire, but Poorvi Patel’s one handed catch in game 14 won the game for The Salopes and they ended up with a tie for the night. Donna Walsh and Jack Lenoir kept the Cheese in each game with some amazing throws and Donna took out three Salopes with one throw! Really, I’m not kidding, it did happen! Well, maybe it didn’t but she was a force and these two teams congratulated each other when it was done and hung out together afterwards. Hey Bobby D, they definitely were “good to each other”.
Week 3 October 26th & 27th
Sorry these are late. We are still getting used to posting them. From now on Friday's will be Standings & Highlight's day...meaning that the Standings & Highlight's will be posted no later than Friday!
Debbie and Tim have been AMAZING in getting these done on time and we are working on having all of us learn how to post them. That way no matter what you always have your highlight's on time!
These Highlights By Debbi Looks like I've Got My Prose Back Lutes!
Sucka Ma Balls 7 vs. Butter Balls 7
This was a tough, even fought battle between the ‘Balls’ squads! Behind Sexy Beast Greg Thomas, Butter Balls was strong tonight….. but so was Sucka Ma Balls, despite Jon Cuprak showing up to play. The ladies on both sides had some incredible plays! Fresh of the DL and without her protective bubble, Sucka Ma Balls’ Stacey Curtis came out firing while Erika Kutsch had some sticky fingers and handled all the balls that came at her. Sounds like just another typical Tuesday night for Erika. The men of Butter Balls used the double team throwing style stragery to gun down the men o Suck Ma Balls. There were some amazing plays and great playmakers, but in the end, it was a draw.
That Cheese Team 11 vs. Sofa Kings 3
That Cheese Team came about balls blazin’ last night and jumped to an early lead. Mark Wohner was charging after the balls like they were glazed donuts. Captain Sonny Maiorano, everyone’s favorite 10-81, must have had Wheaties for dinner because his throws had some heat behind them. He was chasing down his opponents like a cat on a mouse. The Sofa Kings pulled themselves together and managed to take a few games. Gabbie West was a catching machine and held her own when she was down 4 on 1. For the men, JC Hughes put on a how to catch a ball clinic, while Anthony Cantrell and Pat Burris fired at their opponents. In the end, Bob Spring was so sweaty leaving Highlands, his teammates weren’t sure if he had just finished playing dodgeball or watching an episode of Cops.
Out of Bounds 10 vs. Bud Light 4
Out of Bounds really took the true meaning of dodgeball to heart; they dodged balls from every direction. Brian Poole should be dubbed the ‘Master of Dodging’ as he was unstoppable. Courtney Kendall proved to be relentless against her opponents, barely flinching as balls flew at her and managing to catch several that came her way. On the other side, John Leyh from Bud Light was faster than the speed of light and managed to grab balls off the court quicker than anyone. J.P. McKay was an all-star player for Bud Light and proved that he is a force to be reckoned with when it comes to knocking out members of the opposing team. Despite his fiery throws, Bud Light came up short against a tough Out of Bounds squad.
BSD 12 vs. Five Ohh 2
BSD came in it to win it last night and took early control of the game. Justin Witt was the key player for the BSD’s and had some unbelievable throws and acrobatic catches. For their ladies, Melissa Doherty was a superstar! She dodged balls left and right with amazing reflexes. Five Ohh put up a good fight. Katie Jacobs was quick on her feet and did her best to dodge everything that came her way while Dana Steinbrunner was a catching machine. As a whole, Five Ohh played well, but they just couldn’t prevail over BSD.
Team Awesome 9 vs. Shenanigans Irish Pub 5
Team Awesome is a solid team. For their ladies, it was Lauren Barsky all night long. She was almost flawless. She combined with Megan Carpenter for an early ladies win. Believe it or not, Captain Kalai King was on point. He and Richard Derke were firing bullets! Shenanigans Irish Pub fell to an early deficit but mounted a nice little comeback. Lindsay Ostafy took out two opponents and made a spectacular catch to put the Irish Pub in the win column. They proceeded to take the next three games in their late game rally. Despite coming up short in the win column, um, well Shenanigans Irish Pub just plain ROCK!!!
Scratch Attack 9 vs. Saved By The Balls 5
Scratch Attack proved to be extraordinary on offense. Pete Capriotti set the bar high early in the match up with some outstanding rocket-like throws, knocking out numerous opponents. This spurred on Stephanie Bennett, who was determined to carry on the path of prominence that her captain helped establish for the team. Save By The Balls played a strong game as well. Matt Smith was stealth on the court with some slick moves that allowed him to knock out several Attackers. Meanwhile, teammate Josh Einhorn is the king of fake outs. His double pumps and throw in one direction while looking in another strategy knocked out several opponents.
CR Hooligans 4 vs. Daisies and Butterflies 10
Daises and Butterflies pulled off a decisive victory over CR Hooligans. Andy Waslyn was definitely the MVP for Daises and Butterflies! You should have seen him jiving and grooving out there on the hard wood. He was a maniac throwing balls like a wild man. Dave Haley also added some much needed firepower. Heidi Habel carried CR Hooligans on her shoulders catching three balls in a row during one game. She was a human highlight reel. Despite Heidi’s gutsy performance, the shoestring catches and spot on throws by Daises and Butterflies Stacey Clark and Tammy Goldbaum proved to be too much.
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These Highlight's by Tim "I get better every week" Connor!
AVERAGE JOES 4 BUSINESS TIME 10
What else could go wrong for the Joe’s? At game time, there were only 2 Joe’s girls at the Y! Luckily they were Stephanie Shamrock and Amy Taylor. This dynamic duo were catching, throwing and dodging like there were 5 of them! Steph managed to take out 3 Biz Time girls and not throw any balls into the track at the Y. On one play, she had a ball pop up off her shoulder and she ran to get the rebound, tripped over a ball on the ground, hurdled over Amy, went to the water fountain and took a drink, ran a lap around the track, and then made a diving catch! Just kidding, she didn’t run a lap around the track! Amy definitely had the eye of the tiger. She threw one ball so hard it took out two Biz time girls. Two of the 3 Jos’s girls who were MIA showed up around game 6. Maggie Fauver and Cathy Paxon got “lost” along the way. I heard a rumor that a male model had a flat tire and they stopped to “help”. This is believable because they were rather sweaty when they showed up. Then there’s Amy Quan. She couldn’t make the game but she made it to the bar afterwards. She said “there’s no I in team but there is in drink!. Not even Tim Connor’s amazing jumping catch of two balls could save the Joes, Biz time was just too much.
THE UNTOUCHABALLS 14 BALLS IN YO FACE 0
Captain, Joe Kania predicted last week that The Untouchaballs would sweep. He was only off by a week as they swept Balls in Yo Face 14-0. The Untouchaballs decided to dress in their Halloween costumes. Joe dressed as WWF wrestler Mankind, playing in a collared shirt, tie, leather mask, wig, and sockpuppet his cannon-armed brother Clarke Kania was dressed as Shawn Michaels, complete with Heartbreak Kid tights; and Rob Sparks played as the Verizon guy. They were the trick for the evening, but the treat was the Untouchable girls! Jen Coursey and Nicole Bustamante threw lasers, and Rachel Handy, Jess Harrison, and Meg McBride made multiple catches. They were not taking any balls in their faces (at least not tonight!)
BLUE BALLS 10 SMASHING TIME 4
Blue Balls definitely came to play tonight! Mike Avery caught “avery” ball thrown his way. Eric Jordan played as if he were the Michael Jordan of dodgeball, including sticking his tongue out before he threw! Samantha Delpizzo intimidated the Smashers by yelling “hey, what-a you gonna do, hit-a me with the ball? I don’t think so!” Smashing Time certainly got smushed tonight. Maybe they should cut down on the pre-game “Paultini’s”.
BALL BUSTERZ 1 PITCH N RUN 13
Man, Ball Busterz got their balls busted tonight. As a matter of fact, a ball hit Darren Wright right in the head and actually busted open! I’m not making this up, it really happened! Julie Smack led the way for the Pitchers as she threw rockets that the Ball Busterz had no chance of catching. So far this season, Pitch N Run has shown that they are a team in the running for the title.
SHENANIGHANS 10 I’D HIT IT 4
What a difference a week makes! The Luck O’ The Irish was with Shenanighans as they had a convincing win. Erin McLaughlin and Andrew Keenan played like they found a pot of gold! Their Irish eyes were definitely smiling, especially when they knocked out the other team with laser like throws.
HIT IT THEN BOUNCE 7 CHAOS UNDER NEW TERMS 7
Without a doubt the game of the week! Each game went down to the wire and there were so many unbelievable plays I don’t even know where to begin! Maybe it was Rachel Lee making a catch with her eyes closed? Maybe it was David Koston taking out 2 opponents with one throw? Maybe it was Phil Walstrum catching a rebound off of Mike Gregory’s shoulder? Maybe it was Jill Fake’s fake throw where she hid the ball under her shirt and then pulled it out and took out one of the Bouncer’s? I don’t know! But I do know that these two teams will be looking forward to a rematch in the post season!
SHORT BUS SQUAD 10 ABUSEMENT PARK 4
Thomas Payne was bringing the pain to the Abusement Park all night. He was virtually a one man show, using all 5 of the 5 D’s in Dodgeball. The Abusement Park did manage to win 4 games, but the heat from the Short Bus was too much. Not even Sarah Studer’s one handed grabs and lightning fast throws were enough, the Abusement Park definitely were abused!
THE ARTFUL DODGERS 4 BLOODBATH AND BEYOND 10
True to their name, it was a bloodbath. There was nothing artful about the Dodgers tonight. Especially when James Anderson and Pernell Vaughn collided with each other! Luckily no one was injured. BB and B were relentless, but both teams hung out afterwards and it was all good!
16 TON GUNZ INCREDIBALLZ 4
Welcome to the gun show! The Gunz, led by Cliff Murphy and Tawny Murray, came out blazing and never let up. They reloaded early and often and kept the Incrediballz doing more dodging than throwing. The onslaught proved to be too much and the Gunz had a convincing win against the Incrediballz.
GROW A PAIR 5 SALOPES 9
Looks like Grow a Pair hasn’t grown much of anything this year. But they did improve by 2 wins from last week. Not even Gabe Gigliotti getting gigi with his dodging skills were enough, it was the Salopes night! While there were a few close games, the Salopes were able to close and come out with the win.
SLINGIN SMACK ROCKS 6 HIT IT N QUIT IT 8
Hit it N Quit it sealed the deal tonight and had the Slingin Smack Rocks doing the walk of shame back to their cars! It was close, but the Hitters wanted it more! Angela Maida made several amazing catches to ensure the victory. In the true spirit of DSL, both teams hung out and had some laughs after the game. Way to go guys!
STSI 9 SMART ALECKS 5
The Smart Alecks didn’t quite have enough gas in the tank tonight. They held their own in the first 7 games but STSI were being “smart alecks” with their comments. They told the Smart Alecks “hey, don’t be afraid to catch our balls! The Alecks started laughing and said “aren’t you smarter than sexual innuendo?” This may not have been good strategy because when they were laughing, they got hit by balls. How’s that for innuendo?
Week 2 October 19th & 20th
These Highlights are by:
Debbi Liking being back writing the highlight's Lutes!
We have our beloved Debbi Back!!! After a Summer hietus perhaps the most b eloved member of Delaware Sports League returns to do her highlights once again! Debbi is a...ok I can't even say "member of"...she is a Sofa King and has been with DSL almost since the be ginning. We are so lukcy and proud to have her back writing our highlight's and making us laugh our asses off!! Weclome Back Debbi!
Blue Balls 13 vs. The Artful Dodgers 1
One of the keys to winning a dodgeball match is to have a strategy. Part of Blue Balls strategy was to come out of the blocks wearing game faces. Frank Gwynn and Eric Jordan got them started on the right path every time with their excellent ball retrieval skills. The Artful Dodgers Captain Paul Mathews has his own strategy – save your energy, stand back and catch everything that is thrown in your direction. The Artful Dodgers gave it their all, but the strong and accurate throws from Blue Balls prevailed.
Hit It Then Bounce 7 vs. Short Bus Squad 7
This game was the game of all games! It was incredibly close packed full of non-stop action. The girls for Hit It Then Bounce were terrific at teaming up together to throw simultaneously at their opponents. For Short Bus Squad, Nick Anderson played an unbelievable game with dodges like you wouldn’t believe. You should have seen Travis Cyr getting his hands all over those balls as they were being thrown at him!! He looked like he had quite a bit of practice lately! As usual, Eric Cranny was a tough out. When there's that many balls flying around, he desperately wants to stay on the court.
Shenanigans 6 vs. Scratch Attack 8
This was a close see saw battle. For Shenanigans, it was a full team effort and every single player contributed. Mike Neal and Kenny Milewski each made nice juggling catches and Breck Wiedenmann displayed his terrific arm. But the MVP of the night was Cyndi Clifton. She found herself down in a 3 on 1 match up, but she didn’t let the pressure of being alone get to her. She made phenomenal catches, fired some lasers and was relentless as she came all the way back to earn a W for her team. Scratch Attack had a few playmakers in this close match up. For the ladies, it was Amy Richetti. She does everything and can flat out play dodgeball. Matt Quinn made an amazing sliding catch to win a game as Scratch Attack just edged out Shenanigans.
Chaos Under New Terms 11 vs. Smashing Time 3
Chaos Under New Terms is no joke. Jimmy O’Hara had some impressive moves. A ball bounced off his chest and he still made a spectacular catch to get an out. Bonnie Wilson also played a great game with numerous throws and catches to help her team out. Surprisingly enough, Lew Indellini also played like a champ. For Smashing Time, the ladies used an unstoppable triple threat multiple times and were able to get 1-2-3 outs with their extraordinary teamwork. Travis Hogan had some pretty unique moves with back and forth dodges as if he were cruising down a ski slope.
Out of Boundz 8 vs. CR Hooligans 6
Out of Boundz really took rule #76 of dodgeball to heart: no excuses, play like a champion. They were fierce out on the court and Brian Poole sure was in it to win it with some unbelievable plays which helped his team out tremendously. For the girls of the team, Eli Malan had a fantastic game and showed her opponents whose boss. That lady has one heck of an arm! The Hooligan’s squad was nothing short of outstanding. Team captain Amy Garrahan laid down the law with some abusive non life threatening throws at her challengers and was able to help out her team significantly.
DNA Explosion 11 vs. I’d Hit It 3
Both teams came into this one ready to play. It was like a battle field out there with balls flying all over the place. For DNA Explosion, Tammy Goldbaum played an outstanding game and remained the last one on the court on more than one occasion thanks to her remarkable dodges. Gregg Johnson proved his defensive skills as he caught everything that came his way. For I’d Hit It, Mike Clendaniel bobbled the ball off his hands, head and then shoulders but still managed to make an awesome catch. Ed Proctor had some key catches and big plays. For the ladies, Amanda Powell’s laser beam shot won one game and Michelle Melvin and Kristin Rogers both had nice catches under pressure. Despite their great effort, I’d Hit It came up a bit short.
Abusement Park 2 vs. Bloodbath and Beyond 12
For Bloodbath and Beyond, Patrick Reid was a tremendous player in multiple games. He was the last man standing several times, and went on to win game 12 for his team. The guys on of Bloodbath and Beyond maintained control of the thrown balls which bounced off the walls back into their favor and they continued to throw rapid fire like machine guns. For Abusement Park, Emily Klein played like a superstar in game 9 with crazy dodges and throws. Captain Aaron Grossman was also a striking player for his team with more energy than the Energizer Bunny.
Have a Great Week Everyone!
-Debbi Lutes
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These Highlight's are by:
Tim Be gentle this is my first time Connor
Tim is a member of Kickaholics and Average Joes. He has been an umpire and one of the best members a league could have for almost 2 years now. We are so happy to have him writing the highlights with our Debbi. This is going to be a great team!
BUTTERBALLS 11 AVERAGE JOE’S 3
It looks like it’s going to be another long season for the Average Joe’s. They got out to an early lead by winning the first 2 games, but not even Tim “the human highlight reel” Connor could make a difference in this match. He sat out the first game because he needed to break the seal. This was due to a little too much pre-game bud light at Hooligans. He returned in the second game to make a spectacular between the legs snag of one of the Butterballs throws. John Luckini seemed to be slowed down by that beard he’s trying to grow. Maybe if he trimmed it there wouldn’t be so much wind resistance. Newcomers Reagan Moseley and Amy Quan made a stellar debut for the Joe’s but it wasn’t enough. The Butterballs, led by Emily Leach and Nick Tuoni, recovered from the early Joe’s onslaught to turn things around and have a convincing win.
INCREDIBALLS 8 BALLS IN YO FACE 6
Wow, this was such a hard fought match you never knew who would win. But in the end, Balls in Yo Face took too many balls to the body. There were some “incrediballs” thrown by Allison Fielder and Will Aramony that didn’t hit anyone in the face, it hit them in the body. Maybe “Balls in Yo Face” captain Megan Racis should change the team name to “Balls to Yo body”?
THAT CHEESE TEAM 9 16 TOP GUNZ 5
That Cheese Team got out to such an early lead that it looked like they were going to turn 16 top gunz into Swiss cheese. But the gunz would not go quietly. They ducked, dodged, dived, dipped, and dodged but it wasn’t enough. The gunz ran out of bullets and that cheese team ended up smelling like a rose, I mean cheese!
PITCH IN RUN 8 HIT IT N QUIT IT 6
In another hard fought match, Pitch in Run managed to hit it and win it. It was back and forth for the first few games, but pitch in run turned it on by winning the last 4 games of the match. The pitch n run girls won most of their games because they said “nobody hits us and quits us”!
ARRRRR 9 SLINGIN SMACK ROCKS 5
This must have been the “week of close games” for DSL dodge ball. Connor O’Malley brought the luck of the Irish by taking out 3 Slingers in one game! We’re still not sure if there is any truth to the rumor that he told the Slingers to kiss his blarney stones. Courtney Nice wasn’t exactly nice. She caught a throw then she ran up to the line while screaming “ARRRRR” at the top of her lungs. The girls on the other team were so scared they all ran off the court! The Slinging Smack Rocks were so freaked out by this they lost the last 4 games.
TEAM AWESOME 7 SUCKA MY BALLS 7
This was hands down the game of the week. There was so much trash talk before the game security had to be called. Team Awesome captain Tropic Davis yelled “yeah, that’s right, WE’RE AWESOME” over to Sucka my Balls captain John Cuprak . He replied “oh yeah, SUCKA MY BALLS”! Both teams had to be separated but luckily they remembered that we are here to have fun. The brew ha-ha before the game proved nothing as they fought to a 7-7 tie. After the game, the two teams hung out together and it was all good. That’s what DSL is all about.
BUD LIGHT 2 FIVE OHH 12
Not much to say hear other than Five Ohh showed Bud Light their “Five Ohh face” with a 12-2 thumping. Bobby D got a call from Bud Light assuring him that they will not drop their sponsorship because they know it’s just for fun.
BUSINESS TIME 8 SMART ALECKS 6
In another very close match, Business Time proved to be a little too much for the Smart Alecks. Business Time proved that they can pre- game with the best of them at Hooligans and vowed to make up for the Phillies loss Tuesday by hanging tough against the Smart Alecks. Maybe Charlie Manuel should draft them?
BSD 10 SAVED BY THE BALLS 4
BSD came out of the gate on fire. After game 4, Saved by the Balls actually considered changing their name to “Hit by the Balls”. BSD went into “Cobra Kai” mode and didn’t show any mercy. At least they didn’t sweep the leg.
UNTOUCHABLES 11 GROW A PAIR 3
The Untouchables were practically untouchable in this match. Captain Joe Kania predicted a 14 – 0 shutout but they couldn’t quite pull it off. Grow a Pair never gave up but the untouchables were simply too much. Their combination of size, speed, power and dodging skills kept anyone on the other team from growing a pair of anything.
STSI 11 SHENANIGHANS IRISH PUB 3
The luck of the Irish definitely was not with Shenanighans Irish Pub this week. STSI got off to a quick start and never let up. It seemed as though in the 3 games they lost, they were just slowing down to catch their breath. Even with green shirts, Shenanighans had no luck. Maybe they will bring a pot of gold to next week’s games?
Stay Cool Everyone!
-Tim Connor